KVKL Rank Play Mega Preview

Listed with predicted pool play record in parentheses

#6 Pool

1. Asteroid Head (4-1)
The only team entering the #6 pool with a win, A-Head is the prohibitive favorite to come out on top.  They tend to have a pretty fluid roster, but when their key players show up and get the majority of at-bats, they can be a tough team. It’s tempting to put them down for a 5-0 record, but reeling off five straight wins can be tough for a team that isn’t accustomed to closing out opponents.  Regardless, they have a fun next five weeks in front of them.

2. Repetition Coffee (4-1)
Repetition is quickly improving, and has a bushel full of talented players on the team who are getting comfortable with the rules and nuances of KVKL.  They didn’t get the GOTW that Jake and Co. were clamoring for, but they should enjoy the #6’s regardless.  I would fully expect them to jump into the #5 pool in 2017 with a year of experience under their belt.

3. Tech Savvy Realtor Nick Lerner’s Homies (3-2)
The Homies have had some better results lately, and an 11-5 loss to Chalmersiz is nothing to hang your head about, so they should be confident heading into pool play.  If they pull out a win against Johnny’s this week they could potentially be 3-0 heading into the doubleheader week against A-head and Repetition, at which point they might just win the whole damn thing.  Shoutout to my former Growlers Rashad and Tony for holding it down on the Homies!

4. Johnny’s Tavern (2-3)
Johnny’s came into the season with big expectations and has fallen flat, failing to score over five runs in any contest thus far this season.  Thetheme in the #6’s is learning how to win, and this team should get a bit of practice in that department.

5. Grandstand Glasskickers (1-4)
Grandstand is going to get a win this year, I can feel it! Their second game of the double header is against Leafy Greens at 8:00 on YSC 5, and that’s going to be the most fun game of the season, hands down.

6. Leafy Greens (1-4)
Leafy Greens are putting in the work, showing up to practices regularly and I really want to see it pay off in the form of a win.  That Grandstand game is going to be a matchup for the ages.

#5 Pool 

1. Brewballers (5-0)
I reffed the Brewballers game this weekend and have to give a huge shoutout to Adrian for his honesty.  Calling yourself out at home in a close game, that’s some damn good sportsmanship <clapping emoji>. The Brewballers hung tough with the Woost in that game, and it might just be recency bias, but if they play the way they did on Sunday they should have no problem sweeping the #5’s.

2. Where’s My Pitches (4-1)
WMP’s had some high hopes at the start of division play but a one run loss to Red Legs in Week 2 derailed their season.  The loss to Jazzhaus was unexpected, but nonetheless, they should get back on track in the #5’s.

3. Screamers (3-2)
I haven’t seen the Screamers play yet this year so I don’t know much about them (except they post dank memes every time they win), but they’ve faced plenty of good competition and have held their own in every game.  GOTW against WMP’s will have big implications for how the #5’s will end up shaking out.

4. Liberty Hall Late Fees (2-3)
The Fee’s lone win was against Leafy Greens by a single run, which isn’t the most inspiring performance, but they kept it tight against the Ghosts and Los Mats so they clearly have potential.  Their veteran savvy ought to net them at least a couple of wins here.

5. Leeway Franks (1-4)
Leeway has yet to break double digits runs scored in a game yet this year, so the offense clearly needs a little work, but the defense hasn’t been too bad. They held Chamlersiz to 10 runs and nearly shutout Nick Lerner’sHomies, so as long as they can play that caliber of defense in the #5’s they won’t go winless.

6. Bad News Bagels (0-5)
The Bagels are going through a major rebuild and they are probably bettersuited for the #6’s, but props to them for getting that win against Repetition.  They’ve been giving up a metric shit ton of runs, and that’s going to have to improve if they want to avoid getting skunked in pool play.

#4 Pool 

1. Pawsh Wash (4-1)
The Filthy Animals are a consistent, veteran KVKL team that plays solid defense and effectively utilizes small ball to get their runners on, over, and in.  The John Brown division was one of the toughest divisions to play in, and Pawsh Wash kept it close against the elite teams they faced.  These guys are looking like at strong contender for the Princess Di plate if they can keep their cool when they face adversity.  The game against  Los Matadores on 8/7 at 6:30 could decide the #4’s.

2.Los Matadores (4-1)
The reigning Princess Di plate winners are again looking to achieve that glory.  Santos, Marcus, and Erin have been the constants on what is a vastly different team than the one they fielded last year, and those three have done a majority of the run scoring for Los Mats, so the formula to beat them is fairly simple, shut them down and make everyone else beat you. Their game against Ladybird this weekend should be a good one, the establishment Matadores vs. the upstart Harpies.

3. Ladybird Harpies (3-2)
Ladybird fell flat against the Goats this week, only mustering four runs late in the game, but that shouldn’t detract from how successful their run through division play was.  Now they enter the #4’s with expectations of finishing at least over .500, and aspirations of winning the pool. I’m excited to see how they do.

4. Corksuckers (2-3)
The Corksuckers have beaten who they were supposed to (Repetition and Bagels) and lost to superior foes (Free State, Red Lyon, and Sword), so they’re exactly who we thought they were preseason. They have good talent (Austin, Clint, Cole) but sometimes it doesn’t seem to come together as well as it should. The top teams in the #4’s need to be wary, Corksuckers can spring an upset at anytime, but they’re just not consistent enough to break into the top half.

5. The Rats (2-3)
The Rats need to get off to a hot start against Jazzhaus this week and get some positive momentum rolling before they take on some of the better teams in the pool.  A GOTW win over Brewballers showed that when they field their full team the Rats can play some good kickball, but it sounds like that doesn’t happen often enough.

6. Jazzhaus (0-5)
Jazzhaus is going to be good, they just need another season of experience.  They have allowed 8 runs per game, which coming from a division that features Das Boot, Red Legs, and Happy Shirt is nothing to hang your head about.  Scoring runs has been a bit of a problem, but they should face some less defensively inclined units in the #4’s.  They lost the tiebreaker lottery because their defense has been so good, and if they were in the #5’s or 6”s they would be favored in plenty of games.

#3 Pool

1. The Salvador Pereziz presents The Mario Chalmersiz (5-0)
They lost one game, on grass, by four runs and ended up in the #3’s.  I still think they were the best team in the Amelia Earhart division, but tiebreakers are in place for a reason. Now they get to score some runs, make sure everyone is healthy, and focus on the tournament.  If they lose a game in this pool it will be a major upset.

2. Das Boot (4-1)
The only team I can see taking down Chalmersiz is Das Boot and they play this weekend, but because of weather/scheduling conflicts this is their first game since 6/26, so I expect them to be a little bit rusty out of the gates.  Boot had some trouble scoring runs against top tier opponents in division play, and Chalmersiz is known for their defense, so scratching some runs across early by any means necessary ought to be a priority.

3. Merchants (2-3)
The #3’s are top heavy, with Chalmersiz and Das Boot clearly ahead of the rest of the pack.  I would anticipate those two to cruise, while the remaining four teams will beat each other up all season long.  It’s the same old story with Merchant’s, solid defense and an offense that is lacking punch, scoring only 6 runs per game, and only breaking double digits against winless Johnny’s Tavern.  That being said, the Princess Di trophy is definitely in play for the MOD squad.

4. Ghosts (2-3)
The Ghosts started the season off on the right foot, pulling out a walkoff over the Fee’s and have kept that positive momentum rolling through division play.  They get to face a Dan-less Woost this week, so they should get off to a good start again.  Princess Di is definitely in play for these Ghosts.

5.Woost (1-4)
“The Woost can mash” – Cougar on every podcast this year.  It’s true, but what he also says is their defense, particularly their defensive alignment can leave you scratching your head.  They move Dan all over the field, including Rover, which doesn’t seem like the best use of his talents.  If they figure out a spot for him and let him make plays, ideally SS or 3B, then they can win a few more games than I’m predicting here.

6.Sacred Sword (1-4)
I have no idea what to make of Sacred Sword.  They got smashed in week one by Free State, kept it close against Red Lyon in week two, and then cruised the rest of the way to the three seed.  Their game this weekend against MOD has the potential to be very low scoring, and whoever wins it controls their fate the finish third or higher in the #3’s.  I’m going with Merchants.

#2 Pool (by far the hardest pool to predict)

1. Hurtz Donut D-Holes (4-1)
The D-Holes are the epitome of a solid KVKL team.  They have veteran players at every spot in the lineup, they know what to do when runners get on, and they make you string together base hits to score runs. They won’t give you an inch.  Their lone loss was to Channel 6 by a measly two runs, so they’re clearly an elite team in the league.  They have championship aspirations, and winning the #2’s will help them secure a high enough seed to avoid the top teams, at least through the first weekend.

2. Love Garden Squids (4-1)
The Squids didn’t play their best on Sunday vs. KTC, making a few uncharacteristic mistakes on defense, and against a team like Tree Care that will absolutely kill you.  All that aside, Love Garden feels like they should be recognized as a top five team in the league, and they’ll need to win this division for that to become a reality.  D-Holes vs Squids, 7/31 at 7:00, that’s must see kickball folks.

3. Goats (3-2)
The Goats were a 1-0 loss away from the #1 pool, and while that reality stings, they’ve got to be happy to be back into the top 10 in the league after some slippage in recent years.  With Shaher setting the tone at the top of the lineup they’ve regained a bit of their swagger, and the D has been tight, allowing only 3.5 runs per game.  If they can sneak by Love Garden this week, they have to feel good about their chances of finishing top two in the #2’s.

4. Red Lyon (2-3)
Lyon is hurting right now, with both Todd and Chris N. nursing fairly serious injuries.  However, this is the same Red Lyon team that has been to back-to-back championship games, so count them out at your own peril.  Shoutout to Sara W for the hero throw to get Mookie on the foot rounding third last week, that was pretty damn impressive.

5. Red Legs (1-4)
Predicting a team this good to go 1-4 just feels wrong, but that’s why the #2’s are going to be so much fun, good teams have to lose games.  Red Legs, though made up of talented veteran players, is still learning how to play with one another.  Next season I fully expect them to break into the #1’s, but they’re going to take some lumps in 2015.

6. Rockets (1-4)
The doubleheader gods were not kind to the Rockets, playing D-Holes and Squids back to back sounds like a long and frustrating day of kickball, but they do get a GOTW against Red Legs on 7/31 so don’t feel too bad for them.  The Rockets handled everyone they were supposed to handle in division play, but the 19-2 loss to Widman shows that they’re not quite ready for prime time.

#1 Pool

1. Happy Shirt (5-0)
They haven’t lost in the regular season since 2012, and the additions of Chris Ford and Joel Kelly over the last two seasons have kept Happy Shirt humming right along.  Yes, five games in the #1 pool is a tough slog, but these kickball savants will find their way to yet another undefeated record.  They get everyone’s best shot every week and still figure out a way to get it done.  Incredibly impressive stuff.

2. Wildman (4-1)
Wildman continues their march towards one of the most statistically impressive seasons in KVKL history, having won every game by double digits thus far.  Their doubleheader week is no joke, playing Happy Shirt and Channel 6.  They’ll need to sweep that day to win the #1’s, and that’s too tall of a task, even for a great team like Wildman.

3. Channel 6 (3-2)
The rise of Channel 6 was put on hold last season due to a technicality, and you just get the sense they’ve been chomping at the bit to play these teams in the #1’s again since the day the board disqualified them in 2015.  They’ve been on cruise control for the most of the first half of the season, but obviously things pick up big time from here on out.  Happy Shirt vs. Channel 6 at 7:00, 7/31 from Hobbs Park has the potential to be the game of the year.

4. Kansas Tree Care (2-3)
KTC played well last week against Love Garden at Hobbs, falling behind early before showing off their superior athleticism and winning going away.  Some less than inspiring scores against lower tier teams early in the season were concerning, but they seem to have righted the ship just in time.  Their doubleheader day is best case scenario, facing Free State and Muddy Waters, KTC just needs to make sure and win a game or two (or three!) before that day to ensure a top three seed in the tournament.

5. Free State Growlers (1-4)
Free State is coming off one of their biggest wins (maybe the biggest?) in team history, besting long time nemesis Red Lyon to get into the #1’s.  Their reward? Facing the four consensus best teams in the league in a four week stretch, including a doubleheader against KTC and Happy Shirt.  Ouch.  The game to watch here is 7/31 vs. Muddy Waters, the winner of that probably assures themselves a top 5 seed in the playoffs.  Free State is playing well and has a solid core of KVKL veterans, so they’re apt to keep it close against the top four teams.

6. Muddy Waters (0-5)
Muddy Waters won the tiebreaker in the Amelia Earhart division on the strength of their rock solid defense, and they’re going to have to bring that level of intensity to every game in the #1’s. The offense broke out last week, scoring 15 runs, and if they can translate some of that run scoring ability to their next five games, then this prediction could end up looking awful.

Top 10 Run Scorers of 2016 (Week 5)

Weekly Standings 


1. Angela – 6 (Ch.6)
2. Cheyenne- 5 (Ch.6)
3. Jeni- 4 (Goats)
T-4. Jill – 3 (Corksuckers)
T-4. Erin – 3 (Los Mats)
T-6. Arie – 2 (D-Holes)
T-6. Kaitlin S. – 2 (Das Boot)
T-6. Elizabeth – 2 (Das Boot)
T-6. Tori – 2 (Jazzhaus)
T-6. Jessie C. – 2 (KTC)
T-6. Megan – 2 (Wildman)
T-6. Laura – 2 (Sacred Sword)


1. Sam – 7 (Ch.6)
T-2. Aaron – 6 (Ch.6)
T-2. Jay – 6 (Ch.6)
T-2. Jeff – 6 (Ch.6)
T-5. Austin – 5 (Corksuckers)
T-5. Justin – 5 (Rockets)
T-5. Bobby – 5 (Corksuckers)
T-5. Alex – 5 (Sacred Sword)
T-5 Chris – 5 (Sacred Sword)
10. 10 Players tied with 4

Season Standings


1. Angela – 16 (Ch.6)
2. Cheyenne – 12 (Ch.6)
3. Jeni – 10 (Goats)
T-4. Kaitlin S. – 6 (Das Boot)
T-4. Megan – 6 (Wildman)
T-4. Kamari – 6 (Where’s My Pitches)
T-4. Madeline – 6 (Free State)
T-8. Elizabeth – 5 (Das Boot)
T-8. Audrey – 5 (Goats)
T-8. Betsy – 5 (Wildman)
T-8. Lindsey – 5 (Free State)
T-8. Sarah R – 5 (Red Lyon)
T-8. Manda – 5 (Woost)


1. Colin – 17 (Wildman)
2. C.J – 16 (Wildman)
3. Sam – 15 (Ch.6)
T-4. Isaac – 14 (Ch.6)
T-4. Aaron – 14 (Free State)
T-4. Ariel – 14 (D-Holes)
T-4. Seth – 14 (Free State)
T-8. Charlie – 13 (Free State)
T-8. Chris – 13 (Happy Shirt)
T-8. Josh – 13 (Wildman)

How Kickball Saved My Life

Friday June 17, 2016, after their Friday night city league kickball game, Arie Auxter and Megan Hawman of the D-Holes came over to begin making three hundred “breakfast” themed Jell-O shots. It was 10pm and the two women I would ultimately be competing against in Game of the Week were at my house working together to add an element of surprise and fun for our game under the lights.

Five summers ago I was going through a divorce, dealing with a failed business and was very over weight. Pretty much all around one big lump of unhappy. Sure I had my inner circle of music friends and family, but little did I know that in five years time my circle would be filled with dozens of strong, loving, there for you always women in my daily life. These are the women of the KVKL, aka the Laideez, a crew from Kaw Valley Kickball who literally without them knowing it, saved my life.

For the past five years, this is the week in Kaw Valley Kickball that has a strong female edge to it. We have the girl on girl clinic and the ladies podcast, these are events created and dominated by women but always welcome the whole league to join (even you cougar). You may know some of these KVKL-ers already, many play a huge part in the league,  but here’s how I know and love them:

Since I mentioned them already in my introduction, let me tell you a little more about two D-Holes, Arianna Auxter and Megan Hawmen. Arie (like the star sign) is one of the greatest organizers around. She gets you the balls and makes sure we continue to strive to get better each year at the Girl On Girl Action Clinic. Megan Hawmen helped bring our annual Charity Auction to next level heights. She created a database of hundred of businesses that are down to donate to the KVKL annually. The reason we raise thousands of dollars is thanks to her time in getting it off the ground years ago. Both of these women play infield for the D-Holes and they are clutch kickers when it comes to winning for their team.


gotweek 3 jello-shots

From the most fuckable team, Salvador Perez’, Mario Chalmersiz I introduce Ms. Rachna Patel. With one tilt of her trucker hat and her bright white smile, you know you’ve got a friend. She is always the first one to welcome new players, her team were some of the first to drop it like it’s hot on the replay patio, and even though she couldn’t play last season do to back surgery she willingly reffed almost every game. So good to have you back on the field this season Ms. Patel.IMG_8709

Do any of you know the name of the other most winning member in the KVKL (besides Deron belt)? Her name is Brianne Koester. She currently plays for Happy Shirt and has managed to play in a championship team all but one season of her career since 2008. We probably should just rename the championship trophy, the Koester Cup. She also happens to be entering year three of dental school and plans to work in public health. A new addition to the Happy Shirt team this year is long time player and full time contributor to the league Amber Lord Owens. All I can say about this woman besides the fact she dominates equally in kicking and defense, is if there is anything you need last minute she is the one you can count on. We forgot something at the shed, she will go grab, we short a person for the scoreboard, count her in, she’s been a super active part of the ladies podcast and girl on girl every year, we couldn’t do it without moo (wink wink).

She’s been a commissioner on the board and one of the originators of the podcasts, shout outs to Erin Adams, of Pawsh Wash. Yes she is also the one who reminds us to not bring glass to Hobbs, the one to make sure you are paying league dues on time, but Erin is always there when it comes to the KVKL. I actually have time to write this piece today because she is cleaning and organizing the shed for me today. Thanks for all you do Erin, here’s to another championship ladies podcast on Wednesday.


wearing our will there be games boots

There are a lot of women on the Goats who help out the KVKL behind the scenes. One of those women is Lauren Gall. Five years ago on a slow night at harbor when we realized a day dedicated to pushing the women in the league to learn from some of the top players in the league for one day a season could be fun. And that is how the Girl on Girl Clinic began. Another amazing goat lady (since I shouldn’t talk about all six ladies on the goats who all rule) is the one and only Sara Rock. For those who don’t know, Sara is the other half of Scott Stewart, full time KVKL organizer. She opens their home to our board at all hours of the day, and night for us to meet, and discuss for hours all things kick ball. She is very active in local charities and from what I saw yesterday has gotten good at catching balls in the outfield too!


sara rock(in) it

That deep statistical voice of the podcast the past few years is the one and only Cathe Decena. Her career began on Mad Greek (check out the all star game YouTube posted this past week) and now plays for one of this weeks GOTW teams, Kansas Tree Care. When she isn’t predicting run differentials more successfully than CJ, Cathe is kicking ass and taking names in her career for the City of Lawrence.

Where do I begin with the women of the Red Lyon? Statistically the gals of the Lyon are some of the most winning members of the league (next to Brianne and Kayla of happy shirt). Shawna is right up near the top competing in five championship games for Los Luchadores, First Blood and now the Lyon over the years. Emily and the Sarah’s (Riley and Weisel) have played in back to back championship games if ever you want to watch women dominate, just challenge any of these women to do anything and they will top whatever the challenge was.IMG_9197

There have only been two women who have been writers for Sundays in the Park. One is myself, and the other is Liz Shafer. This year she has joined the Rockets and has become one of the integral kickers for their team. She also is a mainstay on the ladies podcast, the woman who adds the humor to all those stats and helped name Thor our podcast mascot.


liz shafer knows how to hold the bag

The Ladybird Harpies are helping to bring the next generation to Kaw Valley Kickball. This neighborhood team where scoring a run was a victory, is now finding the sweet taste of success in 2016 guaranteeing them not a six seed in rank play. Shout outs to Christine Kosirog, another half of board member Matt Pryor, for also opening up your home for a few years of podcasts, and to “summer” Staci Taylor-Ahlvers, who missed her first Girl on Girl so her son youngest son could compete in Zones in diving. I love my moms in the league!


laideez pod cast 2013

My last laideez team highlights are with the Ghosts. Prior to our scoreboard, there was Katie Keating. The lady who held up the dry erase board in the stands every summer so we would know the score and how much time we had before singing take me out to the ball game with Cougar. This season she is the lady with the go-pro, filming segments of games and fanfare each week. She is also a badass camerawoman as a career, which means she can’t always make it to our kickball, games because soccer, or basketball or baseball requires her time. 2016 saw the selection of the first ever two time Commissioner, Ghosts player Diana Garcia. She is the leagues voice of reason, that person who can listen to all sides and seemingly find a way to keep us moving forward. She also is one gonna run you down pitcher for her team. Never underestimate a ghost, like their namesake, the Eldridge Hotel, Ghosts don’t burn down.

I could go on for paragraphs about all the extraordinary women in the league who do more than just show up and play. This is just a small spattering of the talent and commitment that comes from the women who play in the KVKL off the field. Most teams only play with three of us each week on the field and I give mad love and thanks for all of the women who push hard at being the best 3 outta 10 on the field each week, youre all inspirations.


girl on girl 2016


The Viewers Guide to Week 5

The final week of Division Play gives us a handful of tantalizing match-ups, in some cases these are games we’ve been looking forward to since the schedule came out in May. Assuming time and distance aren’t factors in travel (like Game of Thrones!) this would be the perfect Sunday, July 3rd for a KVKL fanatic.

*Amelia Earhart Clusterfuck Aside*

I’m not going to get into all the tie breaking scenarios but just know that if all three teams win, as they’re favored to, then Muddy Waters gets the #1, Goats are #2, and Chalmersiz are going to lay waste to the #3’s.(In this scenario Chalmersiz finishes 9-1, with their sole loss on grass. Seeding that resume is going to be a nightmare, good luck Diana and fellow board members!)

Viewers Guide Times in Bold

Red Legs (4-0) @ Happy Shirt (4-0)
YSC 4, 5:00

It starts and seemingly always ends with Happy Shirt.  They hadn’t given us a vintage Happy Shirt performance until last week when they stomped Where’s My Pitches 27-5, but the lineup looks potent and their typically stingy defense has not fallen off at all.  Notably absent from the last couple of score sheets has been SS Tyler, who is Happy Shirt’s rock. Curious if he’s nursing an injury or just giving the rest of the roster a chance to gel.
Red Legs have played a few close games, and their average margin of victory sits at 5.0 runs per game, which is the lowest of any of the remaining undefeated’s . They’ve shown tremendous mettle in pulling a few wins out of the fire late in games and if they can keep it close through the first six innings against Happy Shirt then they’ll have to feel decent about their chances.
My pick for the Viewers Guide is to watch the first few innings of this game, because Happy Shirt is going to come out laser focused and try and crush Red Legs’ will straight away. In a matchup of the two time defending champs with mountains of big game experience vs. a new bunch, my prediction is Happy Shirt will jump out to a 5+ run lead and hold Red Legs at arms length for the rest of the game.

Muddy Waters (3-1) @ Leeway Franks (1-3)
Holcom Red 5:00

Congrats to Muddy Waters for winning the first ever 1-0 game in KVKL history, that’s some amazing defense on both sides. They should have no trouble dispatching Leeway Franks, but the offensive concerns are real, having only scored four runs per game over their last three contests.  If Muddy does make it into the #1’s they have to defense to hang with anyone, but the offense will have to get better to compete.

Homies (0-4) @ Chalmersiz (3-1)
Holcom Right, 5:00

Shouldn’t be much a contest here, and if Chalmersiz does in fact end up in the #3’s I’ll be curious to see if they go the Wildman route and destroy everyone, or if they follow Red Lyon’s lead and have some fun over the next five weeks.  As stated earlier, seeding this team with a potential 9-1 record coming out of the #3 pool is going to the the committees most difficult task.

Free State (4-0) @ Red Lyon (4-0)
YSC 2, 5:00

Once the news came out that Bad News Bagels were going to be in the midst of a major rebuilding year, these two teams have been on a collision course for the inaugural Deron Belt #1 Seed.  Free State has put up the more impressive numbers so far, but Red Lyon has been playing hatball and generally easing into the season.  That’s going to stop this weekend, where a potentially depleted Lyon will be looking to follow up back-to-back finals appearances with a berth in the #1 pool to further cement themselves as a bona fide powerhouse in KVKL.
Free State has slowly been building a solid team one athletic busser at a time (of the 10 males on the team, 8 have been bus boys at the brewery at some point), but a win over Red Lyon and an appearance in the #1’s would be a high-water mark for this normally lower to mid tier squad.
In a matchup of two veteran teams, mistakes will be few and far between, and as a result this game should go right down to the wire.  Be sure to catch the last few innings of this one, it’s going to be close.

Ghosts (3-1) @ Wildman (4-0)
YSC 4, 7:00

Shoutout to the Ghosts for already locking in the #3 seed, they’ve shown some brass balls by winning a couple of close games and are currently my pick to win the Less Awesome Bracket.  That being said, Wildman will most likely continue their scorched earth campaign (Current runs for vs. runs against, 101-6) so give this game a quick look if you’re out at YSC to see two teams who could potentially be hoisting plates/trophies at the end of the year.

Ladybird Harpies (2-2) @ Goats (3-1)
Holcom Left, 7:00

The Ladybird Harpies are my favorite story of the season so far.  Coming into 2016 they had one division win in their history, and by week four they’ve already doubled that.  I don’t think they have the fortitude to stay with the Goats, who are having a renaissance themselves after a bit of a down year in 2015, but of the three games of major impact in the Amelia Earhart division they have the best chance to pull the upset. Give this game a look before heading down to Hobbs for the main event.

Love Garden (4-0) vs. KTC (4-0)
Hobbs, 9:00

Damn, as a KVKL fan I am genuinely excited to see this game.  KTC made the biggest offseason pickup when they snagged Kenny from Los Mats and he only deepens their stable of athletes.  Love Garden went the other way and cut some players from the squad and thus far it’s paid dividends.  This game is definitely shaping up to be a defensive battle, the two teams combined have only given up 21 runs through the first four weeks of the season, and in all likelihood this GOTW will swing on a single mistake.  No pressure.

Or this week will get rained out and we’ll all just get drunk instead.

Top Ten Run Scorers of 2016 (Week 4)

Weekly Standings


T-1. Angela – 3 (Ch. 6)
T-1. Lesli – 3 (Free State)
T-1. Madeline – 3 (Free State)
T-4. Danielle -2 (Bagels)
T-4. Cheyenne – 2 (Ch. 6)
T-4. Bri – 2 (Happy Shirt)
T-4. Staci – 2 (Harpies)
T-4. Sarah R. – 2 (Red Lyon)
T-4. Betsy – 2 (Wildman)
T-4. Amber – 2 (Happy Shirt)
T-4. Kayla – 2 (Happy Shirt)
T-4. Hannah – 2 (KTC)
T-4. Arie – 2 (D-Holes)


1. CJ – 5 (Wildman)
T-2. Reece – 4 (Ch. 6)
T-2. Isaac – 4 (Ch.6)
T-2. Joel – 4 (Happy Shirt)
T-2. Jack – 4 (Free State)
T-2. Kenny – 4 (KTC)
T-2. Alex – 4 (KTC)
T-2. John C. – 4 (Red Legs)
21 players tied with 3


Season Standings


1. Angela – 10 (Ch. 6)
2. Cheyenne – 7 (Ch. 6)
T-3. Madeline – 6 (Free State)
T-3. Jeni – 6 (Goats)
T-5. Sarah R. – 5 (Red Lyon)
T-5. Lindsey – 5 (Free State)
T-5. Kamari – 5 (Where’s My Pitches)
T-5. Manda – 5 (Woost)
11 Players tied with 4


1. Colin – 15 (Wildman)
2. C.J – 14 (Wildman)
3. Seth – 13 (Free State)
T-4. Ariel – 11 (D-Holes)
T-4. Charlie – 11 (Free State)
T-4. Chris – 11 (Happy Shirt)
T-4. Josh – 11 (Wildman)
T-8. Reece – 10 (Ch. 6)
T-8. Isaac – 10 (Ch. 6)
T-8. Joel – 10 (Happy Shirt)
T-8. Bickel – 10 (D-Holes)
T-8. Aaron – 10 (Free State)
T-8. Torrie – 10 (Free State)

Definitive, Pointless Power Ranking/Tier List Update – Week Three

Hello Everyone,

I’m back from vacation, which means it’s time to update the pointless power ranking/tier list thing. The fact that I’ve been out of town means I haven’t seen a single game over the past two weeks. To create this list I used whatever I already know about the team, combined with the results from this year so far.

The point of separating into tiers isn’t to show how much better the top teams are from the bottom, but to show how evenly matched teams within a given tier are. I did my best to come up with a 1-36 ranking, but for all intents and purposes games between two teams in one tier should be considered a pick ’em game.

Also note, this is 100% just for fun, and not intended to hurt anyone’s feelings. How much fun you are having as a team is the most important statistic, and also really hard to track.


Jake Garden



#1 Happy Shirt | — | 3-0 | Points For: 35 | Points Against: 10 | Runs Differential: 25 |

Happy Shirt has not been the most dominant team in the league through the first three games of the season. But unless I want to end up looking like one of those sports writers who pick Kansas to finish 3rd in the Big12 every year, Happy Shirt will remain king of these rankings until their undefeated streak ends.

#2 Channel 6 | ↑1 | 3-0 | Points For: 58 | Points Against: 16 | Runs Differential: 42 |

Channel 6 has one of the most impressive wins of the year so far, taking down the D-Holes 7-5 without one of their best players. You can’t do that without a strong roster top to bottom.

#3 Wildman Attack Force | ↑1 | 3-0 | Points For: 82 | Points Against: 4 | Runs Differential: 78|

Wildman Attack Force has been without a doubt the most dominant team this season, outscoring opponents 55-0 in weeks 2 and 3. It is worth pointing out, however, that the average rank of their opponents this year (according to this list) is 27.33.

#4 Kansas Tree Care | ↓2 | 3-0 | Points For: 27 | Points Against: 6 | Runs Differential: 21 |

It doesn’t feel right dropping an undefeated team with a roster as strong as thiss two spots, especially when they have the best defense in the league by runs allowed. That said, it seems like they have had a bit more trouble scoring and played closer games than I would have expected so far this season.




#5 Red Lyon | — | 3-0 | Points For: 41 | Points Against: 12 | Runs Ratio: 9.7 |

We’re on to you Red Lyon, with your roster shenanigans and “hatball,” and pretending this is all just about “having fun” and “not being jerks.” Please. We know what this is, a carefully constructed ruse to not be identified as one of the KVKL’s best.

#6 Love Garden Squids | ↑1 | 3-0 | Points For: 38 | Points Against: 7 | Run Ratio: 5.4 |

Despite a too close for comfort 9-4 game with the improved Merchants of Death. Love Garden has been coasting in relative comfort through the tough John Brown division. Awaiting them is a destined meeting with Kansas Tree Care in the week 5 Game of the Week.

#7 D-Holes | ↑1 | 2-1 | Points For: 35 | Points Against: 15 | Run Ratio: 2.3 |

The D-holes move up one spot after losing a close game to Channel 6 and bouncing back with an impressive win over Woost in the week 3 GOTW. The D-holes played their most important games early, and are now able to fine tune with eyes set on the 2 pool.

#8 Chalmersiz | ↓2 | 2-1 | Points For: 27 | Points Against: 13 | Run Ratio: 2.1 |

Chalmers drops two spots after losing to the Goats* and beating Muddy Waters Studios in the week 2 game of the week. Like the D-Holes, they had a tough loss and strong win since the previous rankings. They fall a spot lower on this ranking because, although they have allowed two fewer runs than the D-Holes, they have scored 7 less against roughly equivalent competition.

*On Grass




#9 Free State Growlers | ↑1 | 3-0 | Points For: 68 | Points Against: 7 | Run Ratio: 9.7 |

Welcome to the big leagues Free State Growlers. Despite the second best run ratio in the league, scoring nearly 10 runs for every run allowed, Free State is still a bit of a wildcard. Free State has benefited from an easy schedule through week three. The average rank of their opponents, 24. Still you can only play the teams you are scheduled to play, and Free State has impressed thus far.

#10 Goats | ↑4 | 3-0 | Points For: 51 | Points Against: 12 | Run Ratio: 4.3 |

Winners of the biggest upset in week 3, the goats jump up four places after knocking off Chalmersiz 9-5 @ Woodlawn Elementary. Would it have been a different game at Holcom Blue? Sure. Still, it takes a damn good team to beat a team of Chalmersiz quality anywhere, and the rest of the Goats resume emphasizes that point. This is a good team with a great shot at winning the Amelia Earhart divisions outright.

#11 Red Legs | ↑2 | 3-0 | Points For: 26 | Points Against: 14 | Run Ratio: 1.9 |

Blowing teams out a la Wildman is impressive, but scraping out a close win in the final innings is impressive in its own right. That’s what the Red Legs have done so far and now find themselves on a collision course with Happy Shirt for a decisive week 5 matchup. Worth noting: Happy Shirt and Red Legs both defeated Jazzhaus and Das Boot by the same margin of victory, 8 and 3 runs respectively.

#12 Das Boot | ↓3 | 1-2 | Points For: 35 | Points Against: 18 | Run Ratio: 1.9 |

Note: Das Boot’s week 5 match has not been included the statistics above.
Das Boot falls three places after losing to Red Legs in their second game of the day. Despite showing the potential to play with anyone (see: Week 1’s 10-7 loss to Happy Shirt), Das Boot seems to be continuing last years trend of coming up on the wrong side of every close game.

#13 Muddy Waters | ↓3 | 3-0 | Points For: 34 | Points Against: 15 | Run Ratio: 2.3 |

Muddy Waters Studio falls three places after losing to Chamersiz and a less than convincing 2-6 win over the Harpies (albeit a much improved Harpies). Despite having as good of place kickers as any team in the league, Muddy Waters have had trouble manufacturing runs over the past two weeks, scoring only 7.



#14 Rockets | ↑4 | 3-0 | Points For: 40 | Points Against: 10 | Run Ratio: 4 |

Rockets jump 4 places and into the top 15 after a 3-0 start. If they can be competitive against Wildman (within 10 runs or so) in their week 4 matchup, then expect this team to continue to climb. If not, they may be in for a difficult stretch during 2 pool play.

#15 The Woost | ↓3 | 2-1 | Points For: 53 | Points Against: 26 | Run Ratio: 2 |

This team’s had no problem scoring runs, even against quality opponents. It’s the defense that’s keeping The Woost out of the A tier, allowing almost nine runs a game.

#16 Merchants of Death | — | 1-2 | Points For: 13 | Points Against: 19 | Run Ratio: 0.68 |

Last year Love Garden v. Merchants was a 23-6 game. This year it was 9-4. MOD has shown they have the defense to at least hang around with top teams, but may be lacking the fire power to finish the job.

#17 Pawsh Wash | — | 1-2 | Points For: 11 | Points Against: 22 | Run Ratio: 0.64 |

Pawsh Wash is the perfect barometer to measure teams by in the KVKL. They play safe, intelligent defense. They get runners on and advance them. They aren’t amazing, but are solid in every facet of the game. If you aren’t playing or reffing at 5:00 on Sunday, I recommend heading down to South Park for Merchants v. Pawsh Wash in the low key GOTW.




#18 Corksuckers |↓3 | 1-2 | Points For: 24 | Points Against: 28 | Run Ratio: 0.86 |

The only team thus far to keep Free State from scoring an astronomical number of runs, and played Red Lyon reasonably competitively as well. I still think Corksuckers are a good team. Unfortunately, their results aren’t strong enough to justify remaining in the top 16 for now.

#19 Los Matadores | — | 1-2 | Points For: 17 | Points Against: 40 | Run Ratio: 0.43 |
Because we don’t know how good the 3-0 Rockets are or how bad the 0-3 Late Fees are, it’s pretty difficult to judge Los Matadores results. For what it’s worth, Los Matadores lost to the former 8-5 and beat the latter 8-5. I don’t know what is going to happen next week in a great match up vs. the Ghosts, effectively for 3rd in the Danny Manning, but I’m setting the over under at 13 runs.

#20 Ghosts | ↑3 | 2-1 | Points For: 29 | Points Against: 19| Run Ratio: 1.5 |

Too spooky, moving on.

I kid. Comparative games tell say that Los Matadores are the favorite in their week 4 matchup. That said, I think both teams are trending in the right direction, but Ghosts in particular are coming off a big confidence booster v. Leafy Greens. I say this weeks game is too close to call, but it’s certainly one to watch. 5:00 Lyons East.

#21 Rats | ↓1 | 1-2 | Points For: 36 | Points Against: 43 | Run Ratio: 0.84 |

Rats can score, but dang do they get scored on. Channel 6 scored 21 on them, or 36% of their runs this season. Woost scored 19, also 36% of total runs, and the Glass Kickers scored 3 AKA 60% of their runs this season.




#22 Sacred Sword | ↑7 | 1-2 | Points For: 38 | Points Against: 29| Run Ratio: 1.3 |

Oops. I guess Sacred Sword isn’t the 29th best team in the league. My bad. You didn’t have to go and take it out on Bad News Bagels, but point taken.

#23 Jazzhaus | ↑5 | 1-2 | Points For: 13 | Points Against: 25 | Run Ratio: 0.52 |

Jazzhaus pick up a big win over Where’s My Pitches, who admittedly were playing a double header in “hot as balls” heat. Still, credit captain Rick McNeely for staying positive and and the team for earning a well deserved victory.

#24 Where’s My Pitches | ↓3 | 1-2 | Points For: 27 | Points Against: 29 | Run Ratio: 0.93 |

Note: I did not count Where’s My Pitches week 5 game in the statistics above.
Tough, tough stretch for Where’s My Pitches. Despite the talk about record number of blowout games, I think it says something about the parity in this league that Where’s My Pitches is just a handful of runs away from being 3-0 through week 3. Instead they look destined for the 5 pool.

#25 Screamers | ↑1 | 1-2 | Points For: 11 | Points Against: 22 | Run Ratio: 0.5 |

The Screamers have shown that they can play, keeping it close with Kansas Tree Cares and Merchants. Unfortunately, their signature win against Johnny’s hasn’t exactly held up to scrutiny. Playing in the toughest division (in my opinion) isn’t helping either.

#26 Ladybird Harpies | ↑6 | 1-2 | Points For: 17 | Points Against: 32 | Run Ratio: 0.53 |

Ayyy! Ladybird jumps up 6 places after taking down Leeway Franks and giving Muddy Waters Studio all they could handle in week 3. If they can defeat the Homies this week, then the 4 pool awaits. The question is, how will the Harpies respond to playing as the favorite?




#27 Liberty Hall Late Fees | ↓2 | 0-3 | Points For: 12 | Points Against: 27 | Run Ratio: 0.32 |

The Late Fees are only 6 runs shy of being 2-1 right now. I don’t think they will have to wait much longer for their first win, however.

#28 Leeway Franks |↓4 | 1-2 | Points For: 22 | Points Against: 39 | Run Ratio: 0.56 |

Hot dog, another team that could easily be 2-1 instead of 1-2. (Sorry.) Its been their defense that has let Leeway Franks down, allowing 12 runs to the Harpies, for example.

#29 Johnny’s Tavern | ↓7 | 0-3 | Points For: 10 | Points Against: 37 | Run Ratio: 0.27 |

Ooof. I don’t think John Brown did this team any favors, but I think we all learned an important lesson. The KVKL is not a kind place to the kickball uninitiated, even to athletes.

#30 AsteroidHEAD | ↓3 | 0-3 | Points For: 13 | Points Against: 53 | Run Ratio: 0.25 |
Despite a 0-3 start, I still think AsteroidHEAD would be favored against KU Football if they got the chance. Definitely in football, maybe in kickball.

#31 Bad News Bagels |↓1 | 1-2 | Points For: 23 | Points Against: 57 | Run Ratio: 0.4 |

I’m glad this image was already on the internet, so I didn’t have to make it myself.

#32 Nick Lerner’s Homies |↓1 | 0-3 | Points For: 10| Points Against: 24 | Run Ratio: 0.19 |

RE: Cougar’s podcast predictions

#33 Brewballers | ↑1 | 1-2 | Points For: 18 | Points Against: 48 | Run Ratio: 0.38 |

Movin’ on up.




#34 Grandstand Glasskickers | ↓1 | 0-3 | Points For: 5 | Points Against: 57 | Run Ratio: 0.09 |

When you realize that the Glasskickers still have to play the D-Holes and Channel 6.

I’ll say one thing for the Grandstand Glasskickers, they know how to have fun, and in the end, isn’t that what this is all about?

Actually, don’t answer that question.


#35 Repetition Coffee | — | 0-3 | Points For: 7 | Points Against: 68 | Run Ratio: 0.1 |


Dear KVKL Board Members,

As your KVKL constituent, I implore you to consider a game of the week between Repetition Coffee and Leafy Greens during pool play. These two new members of our beautiful, dysfunctional kickball family should be joyfully welcomed to our league the right way — trial by fire under the lights of Hobbs Park. Fun would be had by all.

I even made a hashtag.


#36 Leafy Greens | ↓1 | 0-3 | Points For: 7 | Points Against: 77 | Run Ratio: 0.09 |

#CoffeeGreens4GOTW #CoffeeGreens4GOTW #CoffeeGreens4GOTW


Bonus Content! Ranking Divisional Strength

Screen Shot 2016-06-23 at 10.29.37 AM

What I did here was look at the average rank of teams in each division. Keep in mind, this is only as valuable as the ranking above, so by definition, pointless. I still thought it was pretty interesting, especially looking at how the strength in the divisional strength is distributed in the chart above. You can click on it to make it bigger. Here is the list from strongest to weakest:

John Brown: 16.2

Wilt Chamberlain: 16.8

Clyde Tombaugh: 18.7

Amelia Earhart: 19.5

Danny Manning: 19.8

Deron Belt: 20

With 36 teams, if the distribution were perfectly even, then the average rank should be 18.5. With that in mind, I think the board did a pretty remarkable job of creating even divisions.

Until next time!

Good luck in your games everyone!



Top Ten Run Scorers of 2016 (Week 3)

Weekly Standings 


1.Angela – 4 (Ch.6)

T-2. Lindsey – 3 (Free State)

T-2. Madeline – 3 (Free State)

T-2. Jeni – 3 (Goats)

T-2. Manda – 3 (Woost)

T-2. Nicci – 3 (Sword)

T-7. Missy – 2 (Free State)

T-7. Emily – 2 (Brewballers)

T-7. Kara – 2 (Ch. 6)

T-7. Katie – 2 (Sword)

T-7. Mary – 2 (Sword)


T-1. Seth – 5 (Free State)

T-1. Torrie – 5 (Free State)

T-1. Aaron – 5 (Free State)

T-1. Trevor – 5 (Ch. 6)

T-1. Josh H – 5 (Sword)

T-6. Ariel – 4 (D-Holes)

T-6. Charlie – 4 (Free State)

T-6. Simon – 4 (Wildman)

T-6. James – 4 (Rats)

T-6. Brad – 4 (Rats)

T-6. Keith – 4 (Squids)

T-6. Adam – 4 (Sword)

T-6. Chase – 4 (Sword)

T-6. Hank – 4 (Sword)

Season Standings 


1.Angela – 7 (Ch. 6)

2.Jeni – 6 (Goats)

T-3. Manda – 5 (Woost)

T-3. Cheyenne – 5 (Ch. 6)

T-3. Kamari – 5 (Where’s My Pitches)

T-6. Lindsey – 4 (Free State)

T-6. Kaitlin S – 4 (Das Boot)

T-6. Audrey – 4 (Goats)

T-6. Chelsea – 4 (Wildman)

10.  11 Players tied with 3 runs scored


1.Colin – 12 (Widman)

2.Seth – 10 (Free State)

T-3. Torrie – 9 (Free State)

T-3. CJ – 9 (Wildman)

T-3 .Turtle – 9 (Wildman)

T-6. Ariel – 8 (D-Holes)

T-6. Charlie – 8 (Free State)

T-6. Simon – 8 (Wildman)

T-6. Chis – 8 (Happy Shirt)

T-6. Josh – 8 (Wildman)

T-6. Shaher – 8 (Goats)

T-6. John – 8 (Wildman)

T-6.Vaughn – 8 (Where’s My Pitches)

T-6. Dan – 8 (Woost)

T-6. Sean – 8 (Woost)

%d bloggers like this: